Monday, June 23, 2008

good signs

The week Before Beach Week I had several creative blocks. I went from worrying about my limited writing topic (my kids, motherhood and all things related) to not knowing what to write about at all. After the 5 week Sprint after Isaac was born (getting announcements in the mail, invites to Andrew's party in the mail, stuff assembled for Andrew's party, hosting various company, and in spare moments, adjusting to Life with Newborn) I was really only good for essentials. I could feed myself and my family. Keep up with laundry. And occasionally sweep the floor. The week Dave went back to work I felt great. I kept thinking "Look at me!! I am doing it!! Mother Extrodinaire!" But, the catch is, day after day feeling like "wow! look what I have done!" is, by nature, exhausting. I honestly felt like I charged out of the gate sprinting and was quick to wear down and poop out. And I've never noticed this before about myself, but I think the initial indicators of having pooped out, were the creative blocks. Writing was hard. Making cards was a chore. And various attempts at baking completely flopped.

But, today, after a week's worth of 'rest' (rest looks so different now), I am feeling very, very creative. I am falling in love with my Canon Rebel. I have a document on my desktop of writing topics I would like to try out. I have ideas for sewing projects, scrapbook pages and I just ordered my groceries for a week's worth of fun in the kitchen. It's funny, because not only did I not know that I was recharging my batteries last week, I didn't even know they needed charging. But they did, and now they are recharged and I am so, so glad.

I don't think I can prevent myself from sprinting off in the future and doing too much. I'm guessing, that in part, it is my nature. But I feel a little more familiar with what it looks like to need rest. And where to go to get it.

So, Dad, if I find that later in the summer I cannot make scrapbook pages up to my expectations, I'll let you know.

Another week at the beach might be in order.

7am this morning. Isaac at rest.


Melissa said...

Isaac is SO big already- how did that happen?

I can so relate to your post. Having that week in Florida back in May gave me such a recharge. I knew exactly what you were saying about how the initial newborn stuff sort of fizzles out, but then you're left still exhausted, your body recovering, and doing the same things every day which involve changing a lot of poop and pee and carrying around a lot of weight. I'm so glad you were able to recharge!

Shannon said...

This picture makes me want another baby. He looks so peaceful!