Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Some thoughts...

We have had a lot of company. It has been really good. Company really helps me to enjoy the city. We go out and check out the neighborhood, or go into the the fun stuff. The latest visitor is looking for an apartment in our neighborhood (Praise the Lord!) and we walked the full 20 blocks of our 'hood THREE TIMES on Monday! I felt like a power house, even though I was just pushing the stoller and my friend was WEARING a baby. My feet are sort of gross: proof of the powerhouse, I guess.

Anyway, they are on the road as I write this and they have been for about 2 hours. Andrew has been down for about an hour and Dave has late meetings and is not home yet. Peace. An hour of peace. Well, grocery ordering, work catch-up, blogging peace. But, still. For the first time, in who knows how long, I am thinking clearly. I don't think I forgot anything on my grocery order. There is nothing else to think about, except what I am working on. No interruptions.

Now, don't think I am going the other way. That I don't want visitors, that I don't like company. KNOW that I do. I love the whole show off bit. The connection. The stream-of-consciousness conversations that I have with these friends. Little stories that end with: I don't know why I told you that, I guess just because I was thinking it. I absolutely love and need these visits. But, the whole life thing thrives on balance. And right now the all-by-myself part is playing catch up to the hanging-out-with-people part. It feels good. Not lonely. Almost as though, even though I am by myself and my thoughts are mine, I am being held tight in these friendships.

I know where I stand. Who I am. That I am loved.