Thursday, October 16, 2008
Yesterday I ended up back in the hospital with my very sick husband. Today I decided to write a letter to my Yesterday Self to give her a head's up.
Dear Yesterday Self,
Today Dave will get very sick. It won't start as much, but just after lunch you will need to begin making phone calls to arrange for child care for Andrew so that you can take Dave to the hospital. You will be really, really worried and you will cry on the phone with people, and you will hate that you are crying on the phone with people, but really, that's okay to do.
You are going to feel like you are putting so many people out. You are going to feel way too needy. But honestly, Robyn, you can't do this by yourself and if the situation were reversed you would be ticked pink to be the one to help out. To be the one that was called.
Andrew will have the time of his life playing with his friend Lucas and then Kirsten will make sure he gets dinner, gets a bath and gets to bed. He will be fine.
Isaac will cheer up everyone in the ER with his laughter and smiles. He will be the cheer up committee and you will be very popular with the other patients. Just don't let him get too close to them. Because honestly? some of them are a little scary.
Dave will get an IV and have a few tests done. You will go back and forth about how serious all of this really is and if you should really be there or not. You will feel guilty about all of the people that are helping you (some of them on their birthdays!), but that's silly. It's okay to need help. When you wonder what to do and whether or not you are making the right decisions, make some phone calls. Call your mom. Call your friends. They aren't in the middle of it all and they can think more clearly than you can. They will make you feel soooo much better.
You are going to second guess yourself all day. But about 99% of the decisions you make today will be the right ones. It's okay to feel like you don't know what to do. Just call someone for advice. They really don't mind helping.
And, Dave will be okay. He just got a bug on his trip and needs some help getting hydrated. This isn't the same problem as what happened last Spring. But this will motivate him (and you) to look into that more.
You will wake up tomorrow grateful that he is okay. Grateful for all the help. Grateful for the friends and the family and the friends that are practically family that are there to help you.
And then you will obsessively clean your home and decorate for Halloween.
Just thought you should know,